bruddernette

I cleared my Glee backlog all 11 episodes (k minus one) but yeaaah, but not my mugging backload. So time to start after lunch!!

I can't believe I wake up at 830 am and only start studying at 12 pm; if I were a verb, I would be PROCRASTINATE.

Studying at starbucks is not that bad; the diffusion of caffeine fumes and jazzy christmas songs (some weird ones) with strange gay couples around you is rather fun. (provided you get a giant teak table to yourself)

1 more week, better buck up. (So tempted by Post-CA plans) And oh, revelation, I'm stronger than I think.

And I am a cool nerd.

I am bleeding out. I am probably losing so much iron, my SpO2 concentration is probably 90% or less. My haemoglobin are all unattached to oxygen & probably screaming in loneliness.

To make up for that excessive blood loss, I watched 3 hours of Glee. So so behind my revision but Glee made me happier. I was a walking PMSING wreck today and (oops) passed it on to the other girls. Sorry. But now I am happier!

But still so so behind my revision.

And oh, find me somebody to love.

is to decrease & increase as with tides.

Agreed.

It will be a good week; with productive mugging.

Will take a break from everything else.

I woke up with a dull ache in my heart.

HEART PAIN.

Heard this on the radio last night.

Save The Best For Last - Vanessa Williams

Sometimes the snow comes down in June
Sometimes the sun goes 'round the moon
I see the passion in your eyes
Sometimes it's all a big surprise
'Cause there was a time when all I did was wish
You'd tell me this was love
It's not the way I hoped or how I planned
But somehow it's enough

And now we're standing face to face
Isn't this world a crazy place
Just when I thought our chance had passed
You go and save the best for last

All of the nights you came to me
When some silly girl had set you free
You wondered how you'd make it through
I wondered what was wrong with you

'Cause how could you give your love to someone else
And share your dreams with me
Sometimes the very thing you're looking for
Is the one thing you can't see

And now we're standing face to face
Isn't this world a crazy place
Just when I thought our chance had passed
You go and save the best for last

Sometimes the very thing you're looking for
Is the one thing you can't see

Sometimes the snow comes down in June
Sometimes the sun goes 'round the moon
Just when I thought our chance had passed
You go and save the best for last

You went and saved the best for last

71 and counting.

NIGHT SAFARI WAS AWESOME FUN.

I was taking care of this pretty little girl, Jolene who sent me the strangest flash pictures. Totally uncharacteristic of a sweet little girl like her!

Everytime she called me (Lynette Jiejie), I melted. And there were some other heart-tugging moments, like when she told me she didn't like her hands 'cos they were too small and all her friends had big hands. Then I told her "But I like your hands!", then she said, "I like yours."

Oh yes, for the unaware, these were kids with muscular dystrophy. Though really, if we look beyond their motorised wheelchairs, they are pretty much like every other kid! 

Sigh, I wished I could hold on to her hand much longer.


After that, we decided that we had to fully exploit the 30 bucks we paid; so we reentered night safari! IT WAS FREAKIN AWESOME. Hahaha, we spent forever staring at 3 civets (was it a civet?); and they came to the glass partition and put their forepaws out and they were really in our faces. And Amos professed his love for them, "You are beautiful! I love you, cat!" Lol.

Other exciting things: WALKING THROUGH THE ENCLOSURE WITH THE FREEFLYING FRUIT BATS. Omg, I nearly had a MI. They were so close to us and they were hanging upside down and every few seconds, their tongues would come out. 

And there was a freaking large alligator/crocodile which looked plastic. And there were 2 giant ones camouflaged in the water with only their snouts sticking out.

We saw the rhino! hippo! giraffes! lions! tigers! babirusas! bearded pigs! many deers like the greater mousedeer & the lesser mousedeer! And yes it felt a little surreal to be walking in the foliage at 11 pm.

Sapped all my energy though; was so exhausted when I got home past midnight. 

An afterthought: When we arrived, it was still closed. So all the lights & shutters were down; it looked haunted. Then come 6 pm, and it was almost magical how all the lights came on, the ebb & flow of people streaming in, the noisy buzz.

I wonder if it is possible for that to happen to us; to have that sudden awakening.

 ..there was not much distinction between losing a best friend and losing a lover; it was all about intimacy.

One moment, you had someone to share your biggest triumphs and fatal flaws with; the next minute you had to keep them bottled inside.

One moment, you'd start to call her to tell her a snippet of news or to vent about your awful day before realising you did not have that right anymore; the next you could not remember the digits of her phone number.



Of course, I hope to keep my friends.

 Funny moments:

# SCENE 1: (Amos looks at photos of my parrot on my phone)
Amos: Your bird is so cool! I have one too.
Lynette: -snigger snigger-
Sabby: I know, I saw it!
Lynette: YOU SAW IT??!!
Sabby: Yes, it's on Facebook.
-uncontrollable laughter-

#SCENE 2: (Sabby attempts to read Guyton)
Sabby: I can't read without highlighting, but it's a library book.
Kaijun: Put a transparency over it and highlight!
-laughter-
Sabby: And wash off after every page right?
-laughter-
-pause- (During which, Amos is rummaging in his bag)
Amos: -whips out plastic folder- You can use mine but you must wash it.
-UNCONTROLLABLE LAUGHTER-

 
I stole this from ning: It occurred to me a few days back that the idea of missing someone is actually very strange. How is it possible that one can constantly be thinking about someone else, missing that someone so much, yet on the other side, that person hasn’t got the slightest clue? Why do we miss people if it doesn’t help either person? What’s the point of even missing someone then?

How true. 

I have been out of sorts lately; really tired, grumpy, annoyed, frustrated, short-fused- the list goes on. I attribute it to a lack of sleep so against all odds, I am going to crawl into bed at 10 pm tonight. 

Today as I waited for my dad, as I watched car after car after car drive past and while inhaling god knows how much carbon monoxide & other noxious fumes, I really felt the frustration in me welling up. After a good half and hour, I thought I might actually scream. Then I got onto the car and before I knew it, I fell asleep. Then I got home and I really wanted to watch TV for awhile but my brother refused to let me change the channel so I stormed upstairs and took a bath. And I felt so crappy for being so grumpy.

I hope sleep will counter all these negative emotions. 1000 things to do and ponder over, but I don't wanna start on any. 

I'm going to forget anatomy, physio & ethics and every other thing I have to yet to do tonight. 

Bet you don't know what that means! HAHAHA coolest lingo ever man.

I started my day feeling very crappy. But it got better. 

I'm having verbal diarrhoea now.

A pause.

A grunt of irritation.

A smile.

A brush against the skin.

Leaning away.

A shared glance.

WIKI SAYS: Paralanguage refers to the non-verbal elements of communication used to modify meaning and convey emotion.

You can't imagine how much paralanguage makes or breaks a relationship, a friendship, a moment.

Jingli says, "You have finally come to terms with it?"

This is why nothing is ever made public because when it becomes public, it's like a titbit for everyone. 

Just watched Grey's S6 Ep7.. and realised how potent one mistake can be. 

In our lives, we make mistakes everyday, some more severe than other, some with lingering consequences. But most of the time, we apologise, we make amends, we tell ourselves that this is the last time this happens and we let it go. Our friends let it go, even strangers let it go.

But if and when this mistake costs you a life, will we let it go as easily? Can we simply cover it up with an apology?

It's scary because everyone slips up but it's much tougher for us to acknowledge that any slip up on our part is one that has dire consequences. 

We are dealing with lives, but teetering really close death.

CA felt eons ago but really, it was just 6 days ago. Like what the pongz! It may have something to do with how they offered us to give us the answers to the MCQs almost immediately after the paper and well there was a resounding 'NOOOOOOOO' but I bet there were people who wanted the answers all the same. Though I think this practice is not too good for our mental health, 'cos imagine you think you screwed up your paper and before you have time to recover, and then the answers released confirms how screwed you are. The suicide rate in Singapore will surely increase!!

But anyway, the trip to the beach was somehow therapeutic. The first part was just a nightmare; if you remember our Primary 6 compositions, ".....the sweltering heat", "the scorching sun.."; I can't possible describe how HOT it was, it was as if we were all on fire. But of course, the sun must set, so it felt good to sit on the beach humming songs while we watched the sun disappear behind this little artificial island along siloso beach. I was a sloth so I barely played volleyball but taking photos & videos were fun. (The camwhore in me is resurfacing) 

Tuesday: Lunch at crystal jade! It was pure bliss to not eat in Science and to have us crowded around a round table- felt very homely! We had a feast of noodles, xiaolongbao, radish pastries, fried chicken for $1, more dumplings lol. Lunch conversations were abit :S, somehow or another we embarked on the topic of "THREESOMES" and it was a lost cause. Tea at Essential Brew was punctuated with many funny moments; laughter is truly the best medicine. And we expounded on evolution theories; how Kaijun must have been a bird which grew too heavy to fly and of course, I learnt how to be Wolverine with the right cutlery.

Wednesday: Driving! I am getting the hang of it. Though I am still jittery most of the time, 'cos driving isn't something very natural for me. Oh haha I finally did some exercise. Went jogging but omg got myself lost on the way back. Was running alongside the canal and trying to differentiate between all the HDB blocks- we need COLOUR MARKINGS AND MORE PROMINENT BLOCK NUMBERS. 

Thursday/Friday: Staying back in school to "study", though on some days, it's uber fail! But I guess it's the company <3 friends. 
Highlights: Yuezhen & Liping comes to visit! Doesn't it sound like a story? Haha so they came and it was back to the good old days of suaning and gaying around and I miss the girls. Sigh, we better gather next year, some mega sleepover at simmy's place!
Highlights: I got home at 715 pm, and was out of the house by 8 pm! Why? Because Sean called to tell me that there's someone who really wants to meet me and I really want to meet the person. The first person I thought of was Jiening, BE TOUCHED <3 Haha, it turned out to be Ali! So yes 1 hour of talking nonsense and we bumped into 2 meddies, Saimeng & Edmund Charlie (??) I am starting to discover all the bishan meddies hehe.

Yesterday! Ummmm, watched Julie & Julia with Ben! Good movie; we were salivating over all the food. And Meryl Streep is hilarious! Then we went down to SAM to look for yen who looked totally disheveled working on her art exhibit. Then Jevon joined us, and it was a house D gathering (: We vegetated in his car then yes I went off to join my OG. Then...yes OG was camwhoring next to the Fountain of Wealth for the bulk of yesterday. Haha everytime something funny happens, Sabby will exclaim, "WAIT WAIT" then whip out her camera to either video or take shots. Lol, more unglam photos of me are gonna surface- please ignore.

So it was good OG fun; we sing, we dance, we didn't steal things! Haha it has been a good week but it felt long. So after an entire week of play, it's now time to mug 'cos the new physio topics are toxic. Plus, there's new anat which is fun but I am not too excited about meeting the cadavers; the smell is just gonna get funkier. Plus, Karawaci planning started & playhouse is soon. And...yeah, I should start getting more enthusiastic about planning med stuff. Relive my council days hehe.

It is iffy.

IFFY.

Yes that's all you will glean.

Another day to waste away!
Okay no, should be Another day to mug away!

I am really eagerly anticipating Monday afternoon; we may have no super concrete plans now but omg I really can't wait.
I am also eagerly anticipating my Grey's Ep 5. Woohoo, TV time awaits!

I don't know much but I know I love you 
That may be all I need to know

(Of course not, I will so fail CA if that's all I knew)

And to overseas friends who feel random pangs of homesickness/loneliness, you are sorely missed. <3

I think I screwed up some nerve in my arm. The posterior aspect of my arm feels funny/numb/tingly. If I go by my anat, then it has to be the radial nerve or maybe the ulnar nerve. I'm guessing ulnar nerve- I probably compressed it against my medial epicondyle while typing? BUT people get carpal tunnel syndrome, not ulnar nerve compression. Weird.

Hopefully it will resolve on its own.

I have a mountain to plough through and I just wasted the past 1 hour on Cafe World. So much for focusing!

I woke up at 7 am today! 
It's a really gloomy morning though D:
I just rushed out my PBP reflections, it's due at 830 am :O I was intending to do it last night but heh fell asleep while reading my notes on the bed. Haha, what's with learning with your head tilt upwards being more effective? I totally dozed off!

Long day ahead of me- striving to be productive is painful especially when the internet is so accessible. We should go back to noob modems, it will certainly deter people from going online and wasting hours of their lives watching youtube or facebooking. Am I glad I'm not a Twitter fan or I'm seriously screwed.

K, time to bury my head in books. Though I'm at a stage of not knowing how to study 'cos... there are so few practices available and pure reading doesn't seem to cut it for me.